Hello all! I’ve often wondered
what’s the right greeting to be used here and quite too often, I’ve started a
post with ‘I’m back’. So am using something different here.
Coming to this post, I’ve wanted
to write this for a long time, in different ways. But over time, I realized
that there’s no point in saying a thing that has already been said in many ways
by numerous people.
When you want to talk about
Bombay (I know it is Mumbai; but I prefer Bombay), no matter what you try to
say, someone, somewhere would have already said that before. This recent post
is a case in point. Here, the writer beautifully describes how life in Bombay
is a struggle, yet you fall in love with it. A simple look at this page will
show what various people from different walks of life had to say about Bombay.
Funnily enough, I kinda agree with everything that has been said about this
city. I am no different. I am totally in love with this city. It was not love
at first sight. It took time. But once that love happened, it has only grown on
me.
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| Mumbai/Bombay: The real city of dreams |
That being the case, I begin to
wonder what endeared me to this city so much. How has it impacted me? What have
I learnt from this city? Here are some musings:
1.
Mind your
own business:
The most striking aspect of this city is how everyone
minds their own business. Everyone is so busy here (or atleast, they seem to
be) that nobody really has time to wonder what the other person is doing.
Everyone minds their own lives and get on with it. I was amazed by this. I can
be myself, unabashedly, without the fear of being judged. Not that I care about
being judged or something, but this city is truly remarkable in this aspect.
2. Never Complain:
Bombay is not perfect. No city is. Every city has its
own problems. Yet, what amazes me is how little people complain in Bombay. The house
rents are exorbitant, owning a house here will only be a dream for most, the
traffic comes to a standstill on highways during rains, the local trains are
almost always full, and so on. Yet, very few complain. They take it all in
their stride and move on. A year in Bombay has made me realize that complaining
will not solve any problem. This has really made my life better and that, I owe
it to this city.
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| This pic perfectly sums up the 'never complain' attitude of the city |
3.
Leave
your egos behind; you are nothing/ nobody/no one:
I may sound like Arya Stark from Game of Thrones, but
it is true that in Bombay, you are no one. You may be someone/somebody, but
that is only when you get into the league of Sachin Tendulkar, Shah Rukh Khan,
Amitabh Bachchan and the likes. Until then, you are no one in Bombay. I learnt
this truth soon enough. When I landed a job and came to this city last year, I
was over the moon. I had my ego and I thought I was someone. But then, I
realized soon that a degree from a top college and a job with a pretty pay
package aren’t really achievements to be flaunted. I looked around and found
people who have achieved much more, but were still counted as no one in this
city. This city can have that humbling effect on you. Even in an area like
quizzing, where I considered myself to be reasonable good, I realized my place
soon enough. The city ‘s quiz scene showed me that I was an amateur at best, in
the face of competition from some of the country’s best quizzers. Whatever
little ego that I had in me was gone in the first few months. I realized that there’s
a whole gamut of opportunities and to become someone in this city, it would
require some real achievement, which would require hard work and dedication.
The gist of it all is that this city shows your place soon enough and inspires
you to aim higher.
4.
Move on:
You may have heard this many times. Whatever happens,
life moves on. No city exemplifies this fact better than Bombay. Rain or shine,
recession or depression, the crowds that you find bustling in the mornings and
the evenings, will always be there. I was really surprised how no rain could
stop these people from going about their routine. I learnt a very important
lesson there. This spirit of the city helped me get over some tough times and
move on. Even when this happened, it was this city’s spirit that helped me get
on with life and return to normalcy. We all crib about so many things in our
daily lives. I am no different. But there again, this city has brought about a
change in me. I no longer dwell on those past mistakes. Whenever I feel low or
I feel like cribbing, I take a local train ride to Dadar or Churchgate or
Bandra. All it takes is a little walk amidst the bustling crowd or a simple,
serene walk by the seaside to get my spirits back. That way, this city has
taught me that no matter what, life will just move on and you should learn to
move with it.
5.
Be
independent:
We may be dependent on others for so many things and
it may not be possible to be completely independent. But it is possible to live
your life the way you want, without depending on others. This city provides the
perfect platform for such a life. There are so many things that I started doing
independently in this city, that I discovered a new self. I explored the city
on my own for the first time. I discovered that there’s no better company than
solitude. To be with self, is a discovery from within. I had friends joining me
from time to time. I had Vibha accompanying me to the seaside or new eateries
sometimes and I had Gaurav taking me to some Hindi films or Sandeep Saw
accompanying me to some Tamil or Telugu films, now and then. But my best
company has always been solitude. That independency is something that I started
to enjoy. It helped me discover a new world and learn new things. I learnt
cooking (I cook for myself everyday now and am a decent cook). I learnt to
solve the Rubik’s Cube within 2 mins and am learning to solve a 4X4X4 cube next.
I began to rediscover my interest in the keyboard. I rediscovered my love for
teaching and that has helped me go to TIME and take classes on weekends for
students preparing for CAT. There are so many other things that I keep
exploring and learning every day that it is fair to say that I’ve gotten used
to this independent life that this city has gifted me with. When people ask me
about getting married and settling down, I tell them that marriage doesn’t
figure in my scheme of things at all. Atleast for now. I am 27 and this city
doesn’t compel you to conform to society’s rules like elsewhere. Maybe a year
or two later, I may give it a thought. Till then, it’s me and my life. If you’re
a girl and if you’re reading this and would be interested in getting married a
year or two later, give me a ping. It may work. ;-) Who knows?
Silly jokes
apart, what I mean to say is that, in this city, more than any other city in
our country, I can choose to live my life the way I want, without worrying
about the whims and fancies of the society’s rules and restrictions. I can go
to the seaside at 2 AM and take an auto ride back without any fear of safety or
getting fleeced. The best part is that, any girl can do the same thing in
Bombay. I can get into a crowded local and not worry about getting out, for I
know I will be helped out. I can go on and on. I feel that everyone should
spend atleast a small part of their lives in this city, so that you understand
what it means to be resilient.
With that, I’ve paid my small, long-pending tribute to
this marvelous city that has been home to me for the past 16 months or so. With
that done, I hope I can get over my laziness and write more of all that I’ve
been wanting to write. Best of all, I hope I could get to work on my debut novel.
Yes, it’s been on the cards for some time now, but my laziness has kept it at
bay. I hope this post inspires me to get working on it again. Hope to catch you
all with some interesting post soon. Ciao.
-Ashwin Murali
PS: I’ve not been paid a penny to write this post
promoting Bombay/Mumbai. I wish that were the case, really. :P
PPS: Ignore that crude bit about marriage. I don’t
want strangers pinging me.
